Master of Desaster

For the first time in my life I was master for my TBE group. We had just finished our last adventure and I believed, our master was not really good at being master. So he build a character and I took over being master.

At first I really liked the idea. I prepared, read the rules thouroughly and even found an adventure ( I did not make one up, we were playing by the book 😉 ). Everything fine! But as time drew nearer, things went downhill…

Note: my group is small (4 players only + master) and young (level 1 characters).

First, one player announced, that he could not join us. Not ideal for starting, but we found a replacement: some nice guy, who had been playing TBE for 12 years! YAY! And I have to be master. Who’s idea was that? Mine…. well… dammit.

Then, the second player told us he couldn’t come – he had _very_ good reason, so we couldn’t force him to come (better reason than ‘girlfriend’). At that point I decided, we could not start the adventure, because we had to replace to of the party after the first session and some events of that adventure would make this almost impossible. But the rest of the evenings group managed to talk me into making some nice story up. “Come on! Give us a mystery case!” Who said yes? Me? — Check list: was I drunk? No. Stoned? No. Stone cold sober? Yes. *bang head against wall repeatedly* I am too nice for this world!

So I went to the meeting place, heart beeting, hands shivering… would they like my story? Did I have a story? .oO(( little voice inside my head says: NO! *giggle*))

First shock of the evening: what kind of group is this??? the most non-elfish elf on earth (ok, I knew that before), a night-blind knight, who cannot smell, and some blood-thirsty mercenary.

My idea was: in a very small and poor village (no- you cannot buy a sword of ogre decapitation in the shop) some 15-18 year old juveniles find themselves mistreated and try to start their own village in the nearby woods. As this is not the best idea in early autumn, they steal foods and appliances, which they need, from their parents. No big fights. Just sniffing around, following leads and such stuff. NO way!

Everything started fine. They investigated the ‘crime scene’ and had some really good findings. But they investigated only three people – so I had to stretch things, because I had to cover at least 4 hours! But after they were finished talking and some juveniles disappeared and the same night more things were stolen – BIG HINT – they were fixed on hunting down evil, greedy, robbers.

So I ended up saving the poor juveniles from blood thirsty warriors (“They attacked us! We can kill them!”) almost by pure definition (“Why?” – “I am the master, I say so!”). Lucky thing was, when fighting, the heroes often missed, so I did not have to fake my dice rolls 😀 Honestly, if they had really decided to kill all ‘robbers’ – I would have set their social status to “Wanted DEAD! Under no circumstances alive!”

Anyway, the evening was still very funny:

  • In the middle of the night. Knight: ” I see a small village ahead of us!” – Me: “You are night-blind.” – Knight: “Um. Maybe I see a light?” – Elf: “It’s not a light. It’s a village. Stupid!”
  • Mercenary: “How much space do I have? My Andergaster sword is about two meters long!” – all others: O.O *giggle* “Difficult to handle, huh?” (Parental advisory and the likes)
  • Our knight in the shiny armour was almost killed by a fox. 😀
  • The elf and the mercenary have problems eating the soup, because it smells really bad. Knight: “Don’t you think, this smells strange, my friends?” Both: “Yes. It’s disgusting… (more talk intended)” Me: “You can’t smell anything!” – Knight: “oopsie. Oh this soup is so delicious! I really enjoy it!” The others almost die of laughter.

Next time I will give them some orks or something really tough! And I won’t have to make up a story! It will be something like: You have been hired to slay all orks. Their camp is next to the only lake within a day’s travel. Just in case you get lost: just go south!


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